Danny and the Viking Funeral
I’m not too happy with humankind at the moment, but I’ll say hello anyway. My name is Danny. To my legions of fans I am known as Danny the Dog.
Today I want to talk about my human. His name is Andrew and he is a real idiot! Andrew wants a Viking funeral. Do you know what a Viking funeral consists of? I didn’t think so, and neither did I until Andrew opened his big yap!
When a Viking died, they put him on his boat, set it afire and pushed it out into the fjord. Oh . . . and one more thing, they killed his dog and laid him at the feet of the dead Viking just so the guy could have his dog with him in Valhalla!
I mean . . . what the hell? What had the poor pooch done to warrant a death sentence?
I had a talk with Andrew last night and told him that if I went first into the “good night,” then I too want a Viking funeral. His buddies should kill him and put him at my feet before they set the boat ablaze.
And guess what? Big surprise, he didn’t think that was such a good idea. So we agreed to just have a simple non-denominational service regardless of who goes first. But if he keeps up with this Viking funeral stuff, it will probably be him . . . I’ll make sure of it.
BTW: Anyone leaving a comment will hear from me, Danny the Dog, personally, as long as the comment states how wonderful and charming I am. And if you want to throw in what a great story teller I am, I won’t argue…Danny
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Chris The Story Reading Ape's Blog 
The next time that dumb human of yours gets an idea, bite his ankle Danny, to remind him who is the boss. 😉
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I’m afraid that I might get rabies if I bite him!
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You are a handsome fellow. In this day and age I’m appalled at Andrew’s insistence of a Viking funeral. Glad you laid the whole thing out for him, but am a little –shall I say–disraught you even considered–you know, an alternate, to make sure he doesn’t change his mind. On the other hand, I may be convinced otherwise.
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I’m appalled by Andrew in any day and age!
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Of course you’re charming, Danny the Dog. I like your suggestion best. LOL
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Thanks, Tracy. It’s always nice to meet a perspicacious person!
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Dear Danny – you are a charming, handsome rogue with a real talent for getting your points across. I have a friend who wants a Viking funeral. Maybe I should ask him if he intends to have his cats killed and laid at his feet. I think Ethel and Fred with have something to say about it!
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I should hope that Fred and Ethel would have something to say about it!!!! As to getting my point across, well, I have to be succinct because Andrew is not the brightest knife in the drawer . . . or whatever the metaphor is.
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Hi Danny, me old mate. Very clever getting Andrew to change his mind. But you still have a little work to do. In case he goes first you need to get him to make provision for you with another home. My owner’s neighbour has vowed to have me. I’m sure a guy like you will have lots of admirers ready to take care of you but you need to get it sorted or there could be bloodshed as they fight over you.
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Woops slip of the paw – the above is from Bobby Dog across the big pond.
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Hi Bobby Dog. Andrew hasn’t even gone anywhere yet and everyone in the marina is already fighting over me. But I tell them that I got to stay with Andrew for the time being . . . the poor sap needs me!
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Danny … Go get on someone else’s boat why you still have the chance. Life is for the living and the sea welcomes all of us Vikings. Thankful this is the 21st century.
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I think I’ll keep Andrew around for a little while. I have a lot of time invested in his training. And the state of Florida still hasn’t evolved enough to issue driver licenses to dogs. I need Andrew to go to the store and get my hot dogs!
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Danny, you are even more clever than I thought – the way you turned that right around and made your human rethink the situation. Kudos, you cute, clever canine, you! (Does that equate to “wonderful and charming”??)
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You can bet your boots that I’m a cute, clever canine. But one does not have to be that clever when dealing with Andrew!
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Wonderful charming Danny Dog – I like your style 😄
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I like your style too. Right to the point with the important stuff . . . how wonderful and charming I am!
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You most certainly are 😁😁
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Dear Danny, I understand you, I wouldn’t like that either, if Matica would die. They can’t kill me and lay me at her feet? But again, Matica might even would do it. Well, you probably don’t know me yet. But my name is Talon. I am a condor.
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Glad to meet you Talon. I don’t usually run into condors very often. Have a good day flying around and doing all that condor stuff.
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Hmm, yes, I am not the usual type. I was glad to meet you, Danny. You know, I was once confronted by a dog, oh boy, what have we done? Fight. Poor dog, I might say. But I left him in one piece. But now, we ran into each other again, And guess what? We made friends. Can you imagine, a dog and condor, friends? But we did. and I am glad about it. Dogs are fun. Have a nice day, Danny
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Dear Danny the Dog, shipping the cat suit pronto… be sure to wear it for practice once in a while… 😉
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Thanks for the thought, but I can’t see myself wearing a cat suit. I’m more of a three-piece, blue pinstripe type of guy. With a while fedora, of course!
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But of course. My mistake… You are feDORABLE!
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That should have said, “white” fedora. I don’t look good in a “while” fedora. And me thinks someone’s been hanging around a certain ape a little too much. “Fedorable”? Really? (Actually, that’s pretty good.)
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