on Jane Friedman site:

I began querying my novel Have You Seen Romit? last summer, a day before school ended. I had spent five years drafting and rewriting my book, so querying felt like the right time. Six months before querying, I met an agent through AWP’s Writer to Agent program who said she loved my opening pages and wanted to see the finished manuscript. I worked on the book feverishly for the next few months and sent it to her. She responded the same day with excitement. When I sent the manuscript, it felt urgent as if the world was waiting for my book.

I had given my best. I knew the manuscript would need changes, but I told myself the agent would make that decision. I knew it was futile to wait for one agent’s response, so I began sending queries on a weekly basis. I stalked agents on the internet, wondering why they were not responding. I realized it was a numbers game, so I increased the number of agents who were likely to be interested in my book.

The rejections trickled in slowly. An agent asked to see my full manuscript and sent a kind rejection letter a week later. A couple of agents admired my manuscript but mentioned it didn’t give them the rush they were looking for. My Excel sheet was filled with red boxes and wonderful comments.

I had heard from other writers how hard querying would be, but nothing prepared me for the pain it came with. I took the rejections personally. At least, some of them. I allowed them to cause me physical pain, terrifying myself with the question, Do I have it in me to find a home for this book?