on Writers Helping Writers:

When it comes to writing a story where a character is going to work through a difficult past wound, there are two behavioral states to convey: one showing their brokenness and dysfunction, and one displaying hard-won insight, self-acceptance, and increased self-worth, all important aspects of growth.

Ironically, writers tend to struggle more with how to show a character’s healthy behavior than they do the downward spiral. (Maybe after all the lessons on tension and conflict, we’ve gotten very good at throwing rocks? Or we’re just all a bit more sadistic that we’re likely to admit!) Either way, that shove down the hill is less stressful to write than the painful crawl back up it.

Here’s what I know: change is painful, both in the fictional world and the real one.Transformation doesn’t happen overnight. So when it comes to showing our character’s path to healing in the aftermath of a destructive wound, we need to take it slow. Trusting others, especially after one’s been hurt, is hard. And believing again in hope, that a better tomorrow is possible? This is often the most difficult thing of all.