on Jane Friedman site:

“God grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and wisdom to know the difference.”

Reinhold Niebuhr

A goal assumes you want to change something in your life.

And The Alcoholic’s Prayer suggests that there are some things we can change and some things we can’t—some things we can set goals for and some we’re better off forgetting.

We need wisdom to tell the difference, or a blunt and honest look at ourselves.

Many books on goal setting leave out this step, urging readers to do anything in their power to achieve their goals. But there are two important caveats they seem to forget, and they’re important if you’re going to give your goals a reality check:

1. Would you really do anything to achieve this goal? Some things may be more important than this goal. It depends what it is. You can be pretty certain that a goal like “stop smoking by the end of the year” has almost no downsides. But would you really risk losing your friends and family or your health in pursuit of a goal?
2. In an age that celebrates so-called eternal youth and the power of the individual whilst telling us we can achieve anything we want to, there are actually some things you can’t do.

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