I just finished a scifi space opera that could have been very good, but wasn’t. A big part of the reason was the author’s over use of internal monologue. I left a 3 star review, something I haven’t done in years, and a long explanation of why I felt the story only deserved a 3, but it’s still annoying me, hence this post.
For those who don’t know what I mean by ‘internal monologue’ it’s the character, talking to herself, but not out loud, hence ‘monologue’. In books, this internal monologue is usually shown in italics, to distinguish it from spoken dialogue.
When used properly, internal monologue is a powerful tool that betrays the character’s true feelings without the author having to say so. For example, I could say:
Jane smiled sweetly at her boss, but inside she was seething with rage.
Or I could make it more ‘show’ than…
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