Monday Funnies…


Walking can add minutes to your life..

This enables you at 85 years old
To spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
Home at $4,000 a month.


My grandpa started walking
Five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he’s 97 years old
And we have no idea where the hell he is.

I like long walks,
Especially when they are taken
By people who annoy me.


The only reason I would take up walking
Is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

I have to walk early in the morning,
Before my brain figures out what I’m doing…

Every time I hear the dirty word ‘exercise’,
I wash my mouth out with chocolate.


I do have flabby thighs,
But fortunately my stomach covers them.


The advantage of exercising every day
Is so when you die, they’ll say,
‘Well, he looks good doesn’t he.’

If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
Start with a small country.

I know I got a lot of exercise
The last few years,……
Just getting over the hill.

We all get heavier as we get older,
Because there’s a lot more information in our heads.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.


Every time I start thinking too much
About how I look,
I just find a pub with a Happy Hour
And by the time I leave,
I look just fine.

You could run this over to your friends
But just re-blogl it to them!
It will save you the walk!


39 thoughts on “Monday Funnies…

    • I know what you mean, Van. People commented to our husband that both our mothers and his father went so quickly. We were like “It wasn’t quick for us.” Then we think about these people who want to keep their half-dead relative alive for years and we can’t help but wonder what’s wrong with these people. Our nephew says the doctors and ministers call it “Treating the family.”
      If I can’t read or write or talk, I will definitely be ready to call it quits!
      Sherrie Miranda’s historically based, coming of age, Adventure novel “Secrets & Lies in El Salvador” is about an American girl in war-torn El Salvador:
      Her husband made a video for her novel. He wrote the song too:

      Liked by 2 people

  1. Saw the title and thought ‘Here goes- another admonition playing on the strings of guilt’ What a relief I can stay exactly where I am.Lazy indolent, getting old and fatter. But I do think a lot! Great cartoons.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Reblogged this on Garcia Talks about the How To's of the iPhone,iPad,MacBook & Apple Products for Non-Technical Users and commented:
    Good Morning Everyone,

    My, have I missed the MONDAY FUNNIES while participating in NaNo. It took every bit of strength that I had to stay focus on what I was doing, so I didn’t laugh much at all.
    So, here are the MONDAY FUNNIES for this week. Sit back and enjoy and pass this along. Chris doesn’t mind reblogs.

    Have a good week, People.
    Pat Garcia

    Liked by 1 person


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